Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I wish you could order shots online.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
