So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize
