Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
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