So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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