yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
