is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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