My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
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Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
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I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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