no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
cat food counts as protein by the way
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
