Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I just forgot I was standing up.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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