your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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