I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
So vagazzling was a success
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize