haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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