My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
