Those balls look pretty dangerous.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
