I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Randomize
