First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
