But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
