think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
