did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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