Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
