i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
