I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize