Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize
