I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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