How'd it feel making her break her religion?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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