My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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