i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
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Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.