I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.