Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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