I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize