On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize