My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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