Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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