I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize