Apparently you make a good broom.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Randomize
