the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
