I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
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Now he's lighting his socks on fire
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
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Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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