I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
