To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
