Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Randomize
