Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
