I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize