They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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