Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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