out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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