No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
She is in my trunk
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize