Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
