I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
