In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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