If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
