Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
operation harelip BJ is a go
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
