well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
