the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
